The Maggots – (Let’s Get) Tammy Wynette

Ah, what better way to celebrate St. Valentine’s Day than by kicking back and spinning “(Let’s Get) Tammy Wynette”, San Francisco band The Maggots’ mean-spirited 1979 ode to girl-on-girl violence? Surely one the stupidest, weirdest and bestest teen punk singles to emerge from America in the late ‘70s/early ‘80s boom.

“Kick her teeth out, punch her face in, notify her next of kin,” shouts singer Vicki Maggot in a flat, nasal voice like a pissed off doctor’s receptionist over a killer wavo keyboard hook and a rhythm section best described as enthusiastic, “she’s so scared, she’s so upset, let’s get, let’s get Tammy Wynette!” Add a totally unhinged guitar un-solo in the middle and we’re looking at 90 seconds of complete genius.

I first heard this song on the ‘Bloodstains Across California’ compilation and have since thrown it onto a bunch of mix CDs, so when I saw the recent reissue of The Maggots single on Discourage records in the racks in All Ages, naturally I had to BUY BUY BUY without thinking. It was only later that I examined the cover more closely and saw that it reproduces a newspaper photo and headline relating to the ACTUAL Tammy Wynette ACTUALLY getting kidnapped and beaten…

I mean, when I first heard the song I wasn’t quite sure whether the violence described was directed against the popular country singer – a notion so bizarro it’s hard to take offence – or whether “let’s get Tammy Wynette!” was just some amazing piece of forgotten slang, like “let’s get violent” or “let’s get crazy” (my preferred interpretation).

But no, a quick google of “Tammy Wynette + kidnap” left me with the knowledge that, yes, poor old Tammy WAS kidnapped outside a shopping centre in 1978, and, whilst there is some argument regarding the facts of the incident, it's clear that someone beat her up pretty badly. And then these nasty fucking punks went and recorded a sneery, dumbass song about it, leaving me feeling as if I’d been sitting in the pub casually laughing at a bad taste gag when someone at the next table got up and shouted “THAT HAPPENED TO ME, AND IT’S NOT FUNNY!”

*awkward*

Well, needless to say, unprovoked attacks upon much-loved country singers are absolutely the last thing we at this blog would seek to condone or celebrate, but what can I say… I’m a weakling in the face of a great record, and the Maggots track still makes me smile like a fool. Crass bad taste and ‘70s California punk always go swinging down the street together arm in arm, and I guess I’d probably put this one about on the level of The Hollywood Squares’ “Hillside Strangler” (“who knows what the night will bring / express myself with a simple piece of string”); definitely more on perversely goofy, parent-shocking end of the spectrum, as opposed to, say, the rather grim homophobia of Fear or The Angry Samoans.

For what it’s worth, The Maggots dole out the same bile to their own kind on the equally fantastic b-side “2/2/79”, which delves into the death of Sid Vicious, and a crazy bonus instrumental and a way-rough demo take of “Tammy..” are thrown in too to help spin out the Discourage reissue into a swell little EP.

What makes it an even more satisfying purchase though is the enclosed booklet, which presents a complete history of The Maggots through a wealth of contemporary flyers, photos, typewriter scrawl and fanzine blather and makes for highly entertaining reading. Formed around the nucleus of drummer Jane Weems and bassist Robert Mostert in ’78, it seems The Maggots proceeded to get through a veritable bus-load of additional members in their short existence, all arriving and departing from within SF’s high school-age punk milieu, raising merry hell in some parental basement and swiftly developing into the kind of band just as concerned with pasting together fake biographies and press releases for themselves and developing their own brand of icky goofball humour as they were with finding shows to play or recording songs. I can dig that! The songs on the “Tammy..” 7” sadly seem to be their only real recorded output, but the booklet makes amends with a whole load of the other rubbish this unique grouping of individuals left to the world.




Discourage still have the 7” on sale here.

Mp3: Let’s Get, Let’s Get Tammy Wynette!

Labels: fanzines, punk, singles reviews, Tammy Wynette, The Maggots