Hi, I know I’ve been neglecting my weblogging duties recently, and for that I apologise. I blame the distress of returning to 9-till-5 work and the fact that a power surge killed my modem last week. But anyway, not to worry, I've got a good old rant for you this evening.

So.. it was my birthday last week (a staggering 22 since you ask), and having been thoughtful enough to provide relatives with a list of cool stuff a while in advance, I received some cool stuff by way of gifts.

My two favourite presents were Sunn O)))’s ‘White 1’, which will henceforth be played at my wedding, funeral, Desert Island Discs appearance and all other notable occasions, such is it's brilliance, and a copy of Michael Moynihan and Didrik Soderlind’s book Lords of Chaos, you know, the one about Black Metal and the associated crimewave and stuff.

After spending a weekend in bed consuming these two cultural artefacts, it is my duty to inform you that I now worship Odin, and will do my utmost to drive the weak followers of the puny Christ from this land with axe and fire. Beginning next week.

To be honest though, I don’t know if I really enjoyed ‘Lords of Chaos’ as much as I was expecting. Don’t get me wrong, it’s an extremely informative and well researched book, and it’s pretty fascinating. It’s just that.. well I guess firstly I don’t think it went into enough depth on the anthropological aspects of the Norwegian BM phenomenon. By which I mean, it failed to really get inside the heads of the metallers to a sufficient extent or to provide convincing explanations of how their crazed patterns of belief took hold – it was more inclined to rely of dodgy pop-sociological explanations and to take obviously self-aggrandising bullshit statements from the participants at face value.

Mostly though, I think the problem I had with the book is that it did a lot to undermine my view of Black Metal as an acceptable and exciting musical genre, by spending chapter after chapter revealing the grim extent of the connections between BM and extreme right-wing neo-nazi stuff. As somebody wisely pointed out to me a while ago, “you can’t just go ‘oh, that band are nasty racists, but the rest of them are ok’, you’ve either got to accept the fact that a lot of these people are politically dodgy or stop listening to the music, cos it’s basically the most militantly WHITE form of music ever devised”.

And the facts presented by ‘Lords of Chaos’ basically reinforce the truth of that warning. While obviously very few Black Metallers aside from Varg Vikernes are actually outspoken Nazis, that’s far from the end of the story. You’ve got to wonder why so many of them remain so vague about their exact political beliefs in interviews, baring in mind that any obviously fascist statements would likely equal record boycotts and commercial suicide. And looking at this in the context of a musical genre obsessed with militant Nietzschian ‘strength of will’, macho viking-fantasy and resurgent pre-Christian tribal culture, together with frequent interview rhetoric of unashamed misanthropy and elitism, and tirades against ‘disgusting and unnatural’ ideas such as ‘humanism’ and ‘political correctness’ and… well, the picture doesn’t look promising for us wussy lefty metal fans.

Further to this, you’ve got to worry about the apparent tolerance of fascism in the BM world. Hellhammer, drummer in Mayhem (about the only member of the original line-up who’s not dead or incarcerated), makes openly racist comments throughout the interview with him in the book and, erm, nobody seems too bothered. Former Emperor member Faust, whose arrest and conviction for the stabbing to death of a gay man are recounted in detail in the book, was released from prison last year having failed to utter a word of remorse, and reports suggest that he’s out having a laugh with his old pals, making guest appearances on peoples records and the like, and generally being treated as a scene veteran / hero as if nothing had ever happened.

And apparently the Norwegian slogan on the back of Darkthrone’s ‘Transilvanian Hunger’ translates as “Norwegian Aryan Black Metal”. And apparently a lot of extreme nationalist publications feature regular columns on Black Metal.

And so on. Naturally this whole aspect of it really, really annoys and depresses me.

I mean, I won’t deny I’m fascinated by Black Metal culture. Look at it this way – you’ve got all these morbid outcast teenagers isolated in Northern Europe, and somehow they get hold of a bunch of heavy metal from the US/UK, and completely missing the inherently farcical nature of the whole thing, they decide to take the theatrical excesses of Venom and Slayer at face value, making them the basis for their whole philosophy of life… I mean, WOW! How cool is that?? What a great basis for a story. And so then they start worshipping pagan gods, wearing chainmail and spikes in the high street and running around graveyards at night waving axes around.. COOL! Those crazy guys! And they make their own music, kicking out the campness of previous metal and replacing it with remorseless demoniac brutality and an almost spiritual intensity, and WOW, check it out, totally extreme metal made by people who actually MEAN IT! Pretty startling stuff, effortlessly evoking the darkest of European gothic romanticism with a disturbing puritan harshness and a strange beauty all of its own, and, hell, I really get a kick out of it. And so before you know it, things get completely out of hand and they’re desecrating graves, burning churches in an organised rebellion against Christian orthodoxy and eventually even hacking each other to death.. now sure, that’s all very morally reprehensible, but I think I can see the fun side and, ha ha, THAT’S the way to fucking do it, y’know! It's astounding to hear about these crazy modern day beserkers actually practising what they preach, and instantly building up a world of fascinating urban myths and rumours in the process..

And then they have to fuck it all up by growing up to be a bunch of pompous Nazi twats.

Damn.